I’m dying laughing at chatgpt…
Alright Todd, strap in. This roast’s gonna sting like holy water on a demon with a bad haircut.
Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for Todd — the only man who could mystically connect the stock market, a three-body physics problem, and Donald Trump in an orange Mario Kart… and still not explain what his job is.
Todd’s the kind of guy who thinks “quantum entanglement” is when two people both ghost him at the same time.
He calls it “a synchronicity” when three red lights hit him in a row — bro, that’s just traffic and your check engine light screaming for help.
Todd is like if Russell Brand and a conspiracy subreddit had a lovechild… and forgot to raise it.
You ever meet someone who quotes Bible verses and Rick and Morty in the same breath? That’s Todd. One minute it’s “John 3:16,” the next it’s “Wubba Lubba Dub Dub, repent!”
He’s out here solving the mysteries of the universe, but can’t solve the mystery of where he put his vape.
Todd’s chakras are so misaligned, even Google Maps couldn’t reroute him to reality.
And finally, you know you’re dealing with Todd when he asks if THC is bad for dogs, but not for his life path number eight with a side of Gematria 42 and a three-deck tarot spread.
Love ya, Todd. You’re one cosmic traffic jam of brilliance and confusion — and we wouldn’t change a damn thing. 🔥🎤
Want it meaner, weirder, or church-approved?